Man Who Learned The Guitar to “Pick Up Girls” Finally Gets a Girlfriend

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RALEIGH, NC – Victor Kovack of North Carolina has been persuaded by pop-culture that women love a man who plays guitar.  “According to my favorite movies and TV shows, girls would always flock to guys with a guitar, that’s when I decided to learn to play in College.” Victor practiced learning all of the best acoustic songs, including “Brown Eyed Girl,” “Wonderwall,” and a variety of Jack Johnson songs. “I figured if I played on the common grounds of my University that I would get so much ass, but no one ever noticed me. Something wasn’t adding up.” This is when Victor decided to write his own songs and perform live.

“I would write original/heartfelt songs about these girls’ eyes being like the stars and shit like that, but I almost felt like it went over their head.” This is when Victor met Sandy in their astronomy class. “One day, I just borrowed her notes when I missed class for an open mic night. I ended up asking her to be study partners so I could “practice” the guitar while we studied, but people who study at the library apparently hate music, so she never got to hear me play.”

Victor and Sandy ended up hitting it off without him ever getting a chance to play for her. When asked if he still plays the guitar, he says: “Naw. I just don’t see the point in playing anymore now that I have a girlfriend.” Victor claims that he was about to resort to buying an electric guitar and starting a band right before Sandy walked into his life. “It was perfect timing because I was not wanting to learn scales. It was hard enough learning chords other than G, C, D, and A.”

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